©2017 Oompa

i used to think birthdays were overrated but now i think being alive is the shit.

People message me a lot asking me to wish their friends happy birthday. I think that's really sweet. But a lot of the time those messages go to my dm's which, as many of you know, is a space I rarely venture into for fear that there will be dozens of unwanted x-rated photographs from the many men who love to scare me on the internet. So I found a solution that might work for all of us (except for the aforementioned men).

1. fill out this form with your birthday request

Include your friend's name, birthday, social media handles, & any info about them I should know.

2. Venmo me $5

Olivia-Gatwood is my Venmo. I promise this is not a scam.

3. celebrate yourself for being a good friend

Most people only remember their friend's birthdays because Facebook told them to. You are exceptional. Go take a bath.